I'm so bad at things!

So, once again, it has been far too long since my last post. Only a month this time, and I've already written on my to-do list (which is on my bathroom mirror) to write again tomorrow, so expect at least two posts in a row. Which is CRAZY, I know. Today, I feel like writing about Home. It's such a great word, in so many ways. It's been talked about to death in semi-clever little quotes and platitudes, so I will do my best to not sound sophomoric and sappy when I write about it, but I do honestly feel like the difference between having an apartment/house/flat/condo/studio, and having a "home", is that feeling of complete comfort and peace associated with the latter. I feel quite at home at my job, in my car, in my apartment, or in the theater we use to put on improv shows. Most of my daily life is spent "at home" in one place or another, and so my life is rather peaceful, calm, and quiet.

I hate it.

That isn't to say that I don't like having a nice place to return to at the end of the day. That's a luxury not granted to many people in the world, and not one that I am taking for granted. On the contrary, I am most appreciative for my apartment and my wonderful roommates. However, the sort of calm, quiet lifestyle that most of us have fallen into is making me crazy. I don't really need to engage with anything to get by, and that leaves me feeling quite unsatisfied at the end of the day. I believe this is what they call ennui, and I now understand its effect on people. I need a change. I need adventure, and stories, and experiences. I need the unexpected. Most importantly, I need to be doing what I love to do, instead of doing what I am expected to do. This 8-5 job, these lower-division, general elective classes, and this silly money business is just so damned tiresome. Give me stories, and people, and travel, and good beer and food, and laughter. Laughter most of all. Home is not "where the heart is", or any other silly saying like that. Home is ennui. Home is boredom, and everyone needs a little bit of that in their lives, but my God, too much can make you crazy.

QOTD:
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” - Howard Thurman